By Yolande Clark-Jackson
Regardless how fine your child may look, it may not reflect what is going on inside. We've all seen small children fall and quickly get back up again like nothing ever happened. We smile at their resilience and expect them to get back up again the next time they fall. But if a child falls off a bicycle and breaks an arm, the smiles disappear and there's a quick trip to the emergency room. Yet, when the injury is invisible, it can be hard to recognize when a trip to the doctor is necessary.
Our young people who are living through this pandemic have already encountered many invisible injuries. Ten years from now, there will be a generation of young adults looking back at the time they had to go to school online and wear masks in the company of family and friends. Worse are those who will remember their split up during this time, that they had family members who passed away, or that they were forced to share space with someone who caused them harm.
The statistics are heartbreaking. According to US News report, the average number of child abuse cases of children 5 and older tripled during the pandemic. This is the reality many of our children and teens are living in now, and they are trying to cope. And Black children are the most vulnerable. According to the National Institute of Mental Health, even before the pandemic Black children held the highest rate of suicides between children ages 5-11.
Cultural Barriers
Despite Black children being at a higher risk for self-harm, what gets in the way for many Black families who need and want mental health services can be the cost of care, lack of insurance or access to culturally affirming therapists. Black communities are also a communal one where aunties, friends, and others from the community are often called in to mentor youth and help them resolve conflicts. And it is not always easy to know when a child needs more than a mentor.
Some kids could be a higher risk
Kids who have encountered physical or emotional abuse, who have been bullied, who are grieving the loss of a close friend or family member, or are experiencing an overwhelming amount of stress may need more than a talk with a friend or family member to help get them through. Certain events naturally cause a period of sadness, but prolonged sadness that doesn’t seem to be getting any better may be cause for alarm.
Signs of Distress
Signs that a child is distressed beyond sadness will not look the same for every child. But experts agree that there are some common signs to alert parents to seek professional help..
For young children, bedwetting, frequent tantrums, clinging or a return to baby talk. While for teens it could be self-isolation, violent outbursts, excessive sadness, self-harm or talk of self-harm. Any major shifts in behavior could serve as clues. The important thing is to get the intervention.
We’re here to help
At Ibisanmi Relational Health we are here to support children and teens who need to speak to a professional. We want to support parents who could use the guidance of culturally affirming professionals who are invested in the mental, emotional, and relational health of our communities. Book a 15-minute consultation here.
And, be sure to follow us on IG at @ibisanmi.relational for mental health check ins and inspirational posts. Sometimes the right words come just at the right time.
