Understanding the Connection Between Love and Mental Health
BY YOLANDE CLARK-JACKSON
Love is often considered one of the most powerful and transformative forces in the world. When shared, it can inspire joy, deepen feelings of safety and provide a sense of belonging. But beyond the benefits love provides, whether romantic, familial, or platonic—it can also have a profound impact on mental health. It can be a source of support, healing, and strength, but can also be a trigger for anxiety, stress, loneliness, or even depression when things go awry.
Understanding the intricate relationship between our loving relationships and how they impact our mental health is essential for fostering healthy relationships and a more balanced emotional well-being.
The Link Between Romantic Relationships and Mental Health
There is a clear connection between how we feel and how we feel about the relationships we are in. Leaning into our relationships come with both benefits and challenges.
Some ways a romantic relationship can benefit our mental health:
Emotional Support and Stability: A healthy romantic relationship provides emotional support, which helps both partners cope with stress, anxiety, and life challenges. Having a partner who can support us is comforting and improves our mental well-being and sense of security.
Increased Happiness and Life Satisfaction: Studies show people in fulfilling romantic relationships tend to have higher levels of happiness and overall life satisfaction. It’s true that we often feel more fulfilled when we have the connection, affection, and companionship of a loving partner.
Physical and Emotional Intimacy: Being physically and emotionally intimate with a partner releases oxytocin, the “love hormone,” which also helps us reduce stress and anxiety.
Self-Esteem Boost: Being loved and feeling wanted and appreciated in a relationship boosts self-worth and self-esteem, and self-image.
How our relationships can challenge our mental health:
Past Trauma: Unresolved relational trauma brought into a relationship from a past relationship or experience through observing family dynamics can become a recurrent source of stress for one or both partners.
Relationship Strain and Conflict: When conflicts arise or communication is strained, we can experience emotional distress. Constant arguments, lack of understanding and empathy , or unresolved issues can lead to stress, anxiety, and depression.
Toxic or Abusive Relationships: Relationships that are manipulative, abusive, or emotionally damaging have a significant negative impact on your mental health. They can contribute to anxiety, depression, low self-esteem, and feelings of isolation.
Dependency and Codependency: Relying on your partner for your emotional stability can sometimes cause a loss of self-identity. Co-dependent relationships may cause feelings of helplessness and exacerbate mental health issues.
Breakups and Heartbreak: The end of a romantic relationship, especially a long-term or deeply emotional one, can trigger feelings of sadness, grief, loneliness, and even depression. The emotional pain of a breakup can be just as intense as physical pain. Moving forward can be difficult even with the support of family and friends.
How to maintain healthy relationships while prioritizing your mental health:
Communication and Boundaries: Cultivating a practice of open and honest communication is key to a healthy romantic relationship. Set healthy boundaries to ensure you and your partner feel respected and supported, which will foster positive mental health for you both.
Mutual Respect and Trust: Define what respect and appreciation looks like in your relationship. A strong foundation of trust and mutual respect can prevent conflicts and emotional stress.
Individual Space and Self-Care: Don’t lose yourself. Your first love should be self love. Even in a committed romantic relationship, it’s important for both partners to maintain their individual identity, interests, and self-care routines. This will prevent emotional burnout, directly support your overall sense of wellness and indirectly support the relationship’s longevity.
Seeking Professional Help: Don’t wait until there is a problem to solve. Couples therapy or relationship counseling can be beneficial for learning how to increase intimacy, for preparing for marriage, as well as for maintenance and navigating difficult relationship issues. Seeking professional support can help improve communication and address mental health concerns within the relationship and keep you on track.
If you feel your relationship could benefit from the support of a trained culturally affirming professional who specializes in relationships, reach out to the therapists and mental health professionals at Ibisanmi Relational Health. Start by booking a free 15-minute consultation here.
And, be sure to follow on IG at @ibisanmi.relational for mental health check ins and inspirational posts.
